Brooklyn Bridge Park Environmental Education Center - 3:00 PM Pick
The Shops at Columbus Circle - 5:00 PM Pick
The New York Botanical Garden - 6:00 PM Pick
The New York Botanical Garden - 6:00 PM
Midwood Branch of the Brooklyn Library - 3:30 PM Pick
Mark Morris Dance Center - various times Pick
The New York Botanical Garden - 6:00 PM Pick
Brooklyn Bowl - 12:00 PM Pick
Von Briesen Park - 1:00 PM Pick
Kensington Branch of the Brooklyn Public Library - 3:15 PM Pick
Grand Central Gallery Annex - 10:00 AM
Sloomoo Institute - 10:00 AM
The New York Botanical Garden - 10:00 AM
Sloomoo Institute - 10:00 AM
Grand Central Gallery Annex - 10:00 AM
Sloomoo Institute - 10:00 AM
Activity Guides
- Beaches & Lakes
- Best Of Lists
- Birthday Parties
- Boats
- Boredom Busters
- Camps
- Childcare
- Christmas/Hanukkah
- City Guides
- City Hacks
- Classes & Enrichment
- Community
- Crafts & Recipes
- Earth Kids
- Easter
- Fairs & Festivals
- Fall Activities
- Family Travel
- Farms & U-Pick
- Free Activities
- GoList
- Halloween
- Holidays
- Hotels & Resorts
- Indoor Activities
- Museums
- News & Openings
- Outdoors
- Parent Talk
- Parks & Playgrounds
- Play Gyms & Sports Centers
- Pools & Spray Parks
- Preschools & Schools
- Restaurants
- Shows
- Skiing & Winter Sports
- Special Needs
- Special Occasions
- Sports
- Spring Activities
- STEM
- Stores & Services
- Summer Activities
- Theme & Water Parks
- Trains, Dinos & Heroes
- TV, Film & Movies
- Virtual
- Visitors Guide
- Weekend Events
- Weekend Trips
- Winter Activities
- Zoos & Gardens
50 School Jokes for Kids — Funny Jokes for Kids to Tell at and About School
These school jokes for kids keep giggles going, even if there's stress about heading back to school.
Whether your family is sad vacation time is over, glad to get away from the boredom of the long summer break, or a bit of both, it’s time to think about going back to school! Your kids can laugh with old and new friends with their favorite school jokes for kids. New teachers and routines can be stressful as well as exciting, so try slipping a note with one of these funny jokes into school lunchboxes, to make your little scholar laugh and show them you’re thinking of them!
And you don’t need to stick to school-themed jokes. Check our list of howlers in these funny jokes for kids. We also have Mom jokes and Dad jokes that will be sure to make the whole family giggle.
OUR LATEST VIDEOS
50 of the Funniest School Jokes for Kids
1. Why was the cafeteria clock behind on the first day?
It kept going back four seconds.
2. On the first day of school, what did the teacher say her three favorite words were?
June, July, and August
3. Why did the echo get detention?
It kept answering back.
4. Why do calculators make great friends?
You can always count on them.
5. What is a snake’s favorite subject?
Hiss…tory
6. What did the buffalo say at school drop-off?
Bi…son
RELATED: Mommy Poppins' Back-to-School Guide
The math book might be sad, but the kids are giggling. Photo courtesy of Rodnae Productions, Pexels
7. Why does your math book always look sad?
It’s full of problems.
8. What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says, “Spit out your gum!” and the train says, “Chew, chew, chew.”
9. What did the triangle say to the circle?
You’re pointless.
10. Where do kids in New York learn multiplication tables?
Times Square
11. What do math teachers like to eat?
Pi
12. Where does a surfer go to school?
Boarding school
13. Why did the music teacher climb a ladder?
To reach the high notes.
RELATED: First Day of School Activities and Traditions for Families
These jokes are on point. Photo courtesy of Pexels
14. What did the pen say to the pencil in class?
What’s your point?
15. What room can a student never enter?
A mushroom
16. Why did the teacher marry the janitor?
Because they swept them off their feet.
17. In what grade do children have the greenest thumbs?
Kinder…garden
18. Why did the kid steal a chair from the classroom?
Because the teacher told them to take a seat.
19. Why did the kid eat his homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
20. What does a book do when it gets cold?
It puts on a jacket.
21. Why is glue terrible at math?
It always gets stuck on the problems.
RELATED: 40 Funny Things to Ask Alexa
Jokes can be found on the playground, too. Photo by Zaid Isaac, Pexels
22. Why did the kid cross the school playground?
To get to the other slide.
23. Why did the teacher jump into the swimming pool?
They wanted to test the water.
24. What is the smartest bug?
A spelling bee
25. What flies around the school at night?
An alpha-bat
26. What do librarians use as fishing bait?
A bookworm
27. What do you get when you cross a teacher with a tiger?
I don't know, but you better behave in their class!
28. Why didn’t the sun go to college?
Because it already had over a million degrees.
29. Why did the M&M go to school?
Because it wanted to be a Smartie.
RELATED: 50 Dad Jokes That Are Terribly Punny
Jokes are great ice breakers. Photo courtesy of the National Institute for Early Education Research
30. Why do teachers wear sunglasses?
Because their students are so bright.
31. What’s the king of school supplies?
The ruler
32. Why is history the sweetest subject?
Because it’s full of dates.
33. Why did the kid study on an airplane?
They wanted a higher education.
34. What happened when the teacher tied all the kids' shoelaces together?
They had a big class trip.
35. Why can’t you teach pirates the alphabet?
They keep getting lost at C.
RELATED: 40 Funny Jokes for Kids That Leave Everyone Laughing
I think we all know where this joke is going... Photo by Tom Fisk, Pexels
36. Why don’t fish go on vacation?
Because they’re always in a school.
37. Why did the square and triangle go to the gym?
To stay in shape.
38. What did the ghost teacher say to their students?
Watch the board, and I’ll go through it again.
39. What do you call a student with a dictionary in his pocket?
Smarty pants.
40. What does your computer do for lunch?
It has a byte!
41. How does a scientist freshen their breath?
With experi-mints.
42. What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!
43. Why did the teacher draw on a window?
They wanted their lesson to be very clear.
RELATED: 100 School Lunch Ideas for Kids
An apple a day keeps the worms away? Photo by Ally Noel
44. What is worse than finding a worm in your apple at lunch?
Finding half a worm!
45. Why are all the books in the library the same color?
They're all re(a)d.
46. Why is 2 + 2 = 5 like your left foot?
It isn't right.
47. Which school teaches you to greet people?
"Hi" school
These jokes stink! Photo by Tambako the Jaguar/CC BY-ND 2.0
48. What competition do skunks win at school?
The smelling bee.
49. Knock, knock
Who's there?
Justin
Justin who?
Just in time for school!
50. What is a witch's favorite subject?
Spelling!
Lead photo courtesy of Bigstock
